A Surrogate Is Wondering If She’s In The Wrong For Not Letting Mom Feel Her Stomach

No one likes being touched without consent. This is body autonomy 101. It doesn’t matter if you are a child or pregnant. So a woman asked a user on her Reddit “Am I The A-hole” (AITA) subreddit if it was wrong for her mother not to allow her to touch her pregnant belly. People rushed to her defense.

Posting on AITA, a forum that tries to determine if users were wrong in a moment of conflict of sorts, a woman explained her situation. In her Reddit post, the 24-year-old wrote on behalf of her family that she is now six months pregnant.

She notes in the preface that the relationship between her and her parents is generally good. But there is one aspect of her arrangement that has bothered her. Her family wants to touch her belly.

“…the family I represent have repeatedly asked if I can touch and rub my belly so they can feel the baby moving and kicking.” she writes. “The wife who always wanted to experience her baby kicking and moving.”

She then explains that this surrogacy is for personal reasons, not for medical reasons.

“For context, she could have a child entirely of her own, but this surrogacy was something they chose not to let the pregnancy interfere with her career. (She’s a personal trainer) I always get asked to touch my belly, but I always politely decline because it’s uncomfortable,” she continued. rice field.

She then sets clear boundaries and despite literally asking her mother to stop touching her stomach, she crosses those lines and continues to touch her anyway. hit a young woman, said it was “ruining” her experience, and told a pregnant woman that it was she The child she carried gave her the right to touch women.

“Last week when my wife and I were having our baby checked, she reached out and rubbed my belly while we talked to the doctor. I kindly asked her to touch my stomach.” “I quickly replied, ‘It could be her baby, but it’s my body, and if she really wants to feel a baby kick, she should have conceived herself.’ rice field.

Since the confrontation, the woman has been receiving calls from wives and husbands, calling her “ahole” to protect herself from her mother.

“My friends and my parents disagree about whether or not I’m human. [a-hole] Because it’s their baby,” she concluded.

The response in the AITA thread was overwhelmingly on the proxy side. After her over 6,000 upvotes in over 1,000 comments, Reddit users sided with surrogate mothers to protect their boundaries with couples. “It’s her body.

Another user wrote, “It’s your body and your rules. Touching you isn’t bonding with or for a baby. They can bond when they’re born.” It’s a fun and exhausting time.”

One user pointed out that if the pregnancy journey was really important to this woman, she might have considered doing it herself. You may have considered making it a lot more important than becoming a personal trainer.Pregnancy personal trainers are great for training other pregnant women how to exercise safely and productively. I think there is demand. NTA,” they wrote.

Another user tried to find a middle ground and understand both sides of the argument. On the one hand, there’s no way this surrogate should be touched without her telling them.

“For whatever reason she doesn’t have a baby, her only connection is one minute at most to feel the movement. Touching pre-pregnancy would be worse than the NTA,” he wrote. She said, “If she had waited until late in her pregnancy, she could only expect a few more minutes of the only connection with the baby than the YTA.

Read the entire subreddit here.

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