Anxious Pregnant Woman Grilled SIL After Giving Birth – SheKnows

Medical anxiety is real, and when it comes to pregnancy, there are many more factors that can contribute to this. I am also worried about my baby’s health.

Reddit user @Natalia-better knows a thing or two about pregnancy-related medical concerns. Unfortunately, she may have let fear taint her relationship with her boyfriend’s sister. No I participated in a game of 20 questions right after giving birth.

@Natalia-better asked for opinions on the nasty postpartum conflict on the famous /AmITheAsshole Subreddit. For context: @Natalia-better is her 29, 32 weeks pregnant and stricken with birth anxiety.

“I have a mild needle phobia, a low pain threshold, and a poor pain coping mechanism,” she wrote. “I cry during smears, get stressed out during vaccinations, and totally hyperventilate during blood tests. I once booked a bikini wax and had to give it up.” . It’s really scary. Thinking about the seams makes me sick.”

Needless to say, @Natalia-better’s pregnancy-related tests and procedures were “terrible.” Her boyfriend “Eli” wasn’t very helpful either. “He either tells me it’ll be fine, tries to change the subject, or keeps making typical male ‘problem-solving’ type suggestions. [like] I have suggested hypnosis and therapy to overcome fear, but it is highly patronized, as if they think it is just fear and not pain. ”

What Eli wants to say do It sounds like the fear and anxiety surrounding the pain, but I know where she’s coming from.No one likes feeling unheard, especially from their partner.

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Her saving grace? “Katya” is her boyfriend’s younger sister, who happened to be pregnant at the same time at the age of 32. “We were close before I got pregnant, and even more so after that,” @Natalia-better recalled. “She was a huge support to me and I really relied on her when I was worried about everything and when she talked to me.

While @Natalia-better wants to know as much information as possible about the birthing process to ease her anxiety, Katya has taken a radically different approach. I don’t know what’s going to happenBut overall it was good and I don’t know how I would have coped without her.”

Alas, their opposing views became a major source of conflict once Katya went into labor. I went to visit Katya. Soon, @Natalia-better started asking questions about her process for getting around her own worries.

“I asked her for details and she kept giving vague answers, brushing me off and saying, ‘It was terrible, but she’s fine now and didn’t want to talk about it.’ rice field.”

But @Natalia-better failed to honor Katya’s boundaries. … She said she was of no help to me. She was not my therapist. I was selfish and narcissistic. She left most of her pregnancy to my feelings! She said I should have sorted myself out before I “conceived myself” and she felt sorry for Eli! I said I expected it to. ”

“Eli said he shouldn’t have said what he did, but maybe [was] Hormones, and I probably shouldn’t have pushed her to talk about ‘support’ again,” she continued. ”

According to AITA Redditors in the comments, @Natalia-better says absolutely You are wrong here. Her fears are understandable, but how she handled them is another story.

“YTA,” one commenter opined. “You’re taking her anxiety off her new mom, and before she becomes her new mom, You’ve already occupied her mental space, and perhaps her delight in expecting her new baby in your Death Star prospects.They also suggested finding a therapist or doula to support @Natalia-better before, during and after giving birth.

“You treat her like a case study,” another user interjected.She was clear and asked you to withdraw. It’s clear that you were only thinking about yourself and had no intention of participating in the joy of welcoming a new member into the family. That’s why she invited you in the first place. You were completely disrespectful. ”

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