It can be difficult to meet parental expectations.
It’s hard to find a balance between knowing and following your heart and doing your best to make them proud.
One woman took to the subreddit “r/AmItheA–hole” to ask if it was a mistake to make her father believe momentarily that she might be pregnant.
Her father believed in her as she struggled to overcome her alcoholism.
She provides context about her struggles and lets readers know she doesn’t have children yet.
A few weeks before the post, she joined her family at a restaurant to celebrate her father’s birthday.
She’s currently sober and wants things to stay the way they are, but has chosen not to let her family into the fact that she’s no longer drinking.
She didn’t want to disappoint them if it recurred.
I ordered lemonade and water with dinner and my mother thought I might be pregnant.
The mother said, “Do you have anything to tell us? Are you hiding something?”
This question came to her father’s attention as the grandfather was looking forward to what his grandson could do and thought he might finally get the chance to be a grandfather.
The woman reluctantly said no, but felt sick because of the disappointment on her father’s face.
He asked his daughter why she didn’t drink if she wasn’t pregnant.
Her mother also joined in the interrogation, and eventually she left the restaurant feeling overwhelmed.
Now her mother says she “broken his heart and tricked him into believing.” [you] finally changed [your] Mind. “
She tells her readers that she is an only child and that her father is her only hope of having a grandchild who will carry on the family name.
Her father is insecure because she was unable to have children, and she feels guilty because she believes he will make a great grandfather.
Now she wants to know if it’s wrong to spoil grandchildren by depriving their fathers of their grandpa’s experience.
Redditors took her side and made her feel as though she had done nothing wrong.
1 person posted. I wish you the best of luck. “
They also gave their opinions on how she behaved at dinner. It’s their expectation that she believes she can only get pregnant if she refuses to drink, you answered honestly. Incident resolved. “
Related articles on YourTango:
Another said, “Do you drink lemonade and apologize? Great? There are many reasons not to drink.”
“Even if the OP’s family doesn’t know she’s an alcoholic, it’s literally not their job and they should apologize to her for building up the guilt. Whoa.”
One commenter pointed out that the father’s desire to pass on his surname to his grandchildren was misplaced.
He added, “Also, unless she is ‘doing it alone,’ the child usually bears the father’s name.
NyRee Ausler is a writer from Seattle, Washington, author of seven books. She covers lifestyle, entertainment, news, navigating the workplace, social issues and more.